Tanzania Journal, part 3

Feb 20, 2025

Monday

This was our first full day in camp. The staff served us coffee in our rooms as a wake up call, then gave us a nice breakfast.

At 7:30 we hopped in the Land Rover and took off across the wild savannah. The first critters we met were a pair of hyenas crossing the road ahead of us. Like the other animals, they paid us no mind and passed within a couple yards of us.

The animals were a little sparse in the morning, so I had time to focus on some of the more interesting trees.

This is a candleabra tree; it has no leaves or needles, but instead all the branches are succulents. It’s like someone crossed a cactus with a Bradford pear. Which actually would be the best thing that ever happened to a Bradford pear.

Nearby is a type of acacia tree that is known as the sausage tree. Why? Because it looks like an old-time butcher hung sausages from each branch.

Eugene told us that the sausage shaped fruit will sicken humans, but that hippos love them. I asked how the hippos climbed the tree to get them. He looked at me as if unsure if I was joking or the stupidest American he had ever met. No, he said, they eat the fruit that falls on the ground.

I made a mental note to ask him the most inane questions I can think of at least twice a day. I will update you.

After a couple hours of unsuccessful animal tracking, Eugene stopped the jeep and set us up for a tea break. He even had some hard bisquits that those weird Brits are somehow fond of. I gnawed on one slowly, trying not to crack a tooth, and enjoyed a chance to stretch my legs.

e soon ran into that huge herd of zebras that we had seen the day before, but this time they were joined by allies: several hundred wildebeests. Eugene explained that this is common, and helps both species. The zebras have better eyesight and are great at spotting predators, but the wildebeests have an almost magical agility to figure out where it will rain.

Not too long after this we met an animal that has always fascinated me: the giraffe. A group of three of them was crossing the road ahead of us and thoughtfully posed for a few pics.

We headed back to camp for lunch and rest until the evening game drive.

Eugene drove us 45 minutes through some very rough roads to the hippo ponds. And let me tell you something about hippos: they stink.

Hippos only go out of the stagnant water at night, to feed on grass or hopefully find a sausage tree. They return to the stagnant water before sunlight, and spend the entire rest of the day doing nothing but a prodigious amount of pooping in the stagnant water. ALL SEASON LONG. And did I mention the water is stagnant? The mud is about 70 percent poo. You can imagine the smell. Actually, you probably can’t. Try this: picture this: you eating at a White Castle. Okay, that’s a good start. Then the AC breaks down. And the toilet backs up. And there is a dead skunk in the trash can. And four hundred circus clowns who have not showered in a week start a flatulence contest.

If you can imagine that you might be able to imagine what a hippo pond smells like.

We didn’t see much on the way home except a couple jackals. Who apparently really need a good PR firm, because Jackals are way cooler than most of us think. Yes, they are scavengers, but is that any less noble than a lion hunting an antelope, especially since they almost always hunt the very young ones? And besides, jackals have some really beautiful markings; They are more like wild dogs than anything. I ask Eugene if I can take one home for a pet. He just looks at me and grins. Dang. The dude is catching on.

Note to self: The questions must be stupid but not too stupid.